How can I say goodbye to your loving eyes?
How will I survive without your knowing smile?
In dark times a mother’s sigh,
In lighter days my spirit’s high.
I prayed that your suffering be replaced by mine.
Now answered, though not how I had in mind,
without you I endure endless sleepless nights,
yearning for your touch, or at least a memory not darkened.
The flow of life within is dammed with death,
replaced violently by streams of tears,
angry, bitter, burning springs of pain
pouring out of infinite emptiness, out of nowhere.
Only a pathetic semblance remains
of the zealous, rebellious fire that was I,
all that remains the cold, quiescent gestures of the abject cynic,
burned out coals the only evidence that it ever was alive.
What have they done?
What have they done to my mother?
I challenge, G-d, help me understand,
What have they done to your earth?
you will never know the things I told you
whispered softly in the night when we were alone,
when you were dreaming of a better place.
Perhaps one day I will tell you…
On that day I will be enveloped once again
by the warm radiance of your loving eyes
and know what it means to live again.
But now this pain is killing me slowly,
deliberately, mocking me,
and until that day comes I will know what it means
to die a little every day.
Until Moshiach comes.